Energy Message

When Leaders don't Listen!

When a leader doesn't listen it costs the company greatly.  You and I both know how valuable we feel when we are listened to.  We all have the responsibility to listen and hear what someone is telling us, but leaders have a greater responsibility to do so.  First, adequate and accurate information can only be collected by listening.  Second, the best decisions are made by the leader who has listened to what his or her people are saying. 

Along with these - feeling valuable, getting adequate and accurate information and the impact on decision making - when a leader listens he or she is building energy into the company.  One of the best leaders I know makes it a point to stop what he is doing and give total attention to the person talking to him, no matter who that person is.  He's also learned that listen is not designed to make decisions for people, but to build within them the capacity to decide.  If you intend to have a energetic organization I'd suggest you practice listening. 

Or, as my mother use to say, "There was an old bird that lived in an oak.  The less he heard the more he spoke.  The more he spoke the less he heard.  We have a lot of those kinds of birds.  BUT, there was an old bird that lived in an oak.  The more he heard the less he spoke.  The less he spoke the more he heard.  We need more of those kinds of birds."

Have a great week,

Dr. Bob

   

Making the best possible decisions

I've found that one of the big concerns of leaders and managers is decision making.  After all when you are making decisions that impact the lives of others and the profitability of a company it ought to be a concern.  There are no easy ways to make a really good decision, but there are some things to avoid.  The pitfalls to making good decisions are prejudice, susceptibility, and authoritarianism.  Rather than trying to explain these in this blog click on the link below and read my most recent article on decision making.  After you read it please complete the simple evaluation at the bottom of the article.

http://www.thefabricator.com/Articles/Fabricating_Exclusive.cfm?ID=1093

A hint for making good decisions is having the right attitude about people and the work that we do.  The more positive the energy the better the decision.  Let me know what you think about the article.

Best,

Dr. Bob

Giving the Boss from Hades Time but not Energy!

You can give a person time, but not energy.  I know it seems impossible,
but it's not!  The first step is to accept the person where they are or for
what they are - impossible to deal with.  Here's the deal, we think we
can get everyone to communicate with us.  "Let me get a hold on him,
I'll make him talk!"  That's a myth.  People choose to communicate or
not to communicate.  If he is choosing not to communicate no prompting
in the world is going to make him open up.  So, accepting a person just
as they are allows us to get over our need for them to be the way we
want them to be.  The decision to accept belongs to you.

The second step for giving time, but not energy is to never explain,
defend or justify your actions to this type person.  It's a complete waste
of energy.  Generally he or she is not interested in explanations or
justification.  The more you try to explain the deeper the energy drain
you get yourself into.  Provide facts and ask questions for clarification,
when necessary.  Both of these steps will take time but you won't drain
energy trying to make him a better communicator.

Best to you all,

Dr. Bob

Tips to Keep Energy High

Persistence without Resistance is Repetition

Problems do have there benefits.  I think some people would argue this point.  It's hard enough maintaining energy each day, but when difficulty or adversity hits it's really tough.  I content it's not the adversity that gets us, it's the way we react to adversity.  Some people fret and worry, while others just let it go.  The majority of us do a combination of both.  We worry and fret until we realize that won't help us, then we let it go.

Here's a energized way to look at adversity - "This is something that is going to make me a stronger person."  We all must have resistance to make us grow.  I like the saying, "If you always do what you have always done, you always get what you always got."  Problems, difficulties, and adversity push us out of our comfort zone and cause us to grow.   Real learning and growth comes when you see the troubles as the mechanism for growth. 

Best to you,

Dr. Bob 

The Boss from the Underworld II

We established in the last Energy Messge that the boss from Hades negatively affects the energy and productivity of a team.  I'm certain many of you have examples you can offer about such a boss, especially examples of how enterprise energy was drained.  The obvious question is, "What do I do about it?"

Here's a good principle to operate by when faced with any difficulty - The responsibility for change is always, always up to me.  When something or someone is causing adversity in my life, it's up to me to do something about it.  All the complaining in the world about another person is not going to make them different.  We can change no one!  All changes come from within me!  Here's a few ideas for dealing with the boss from the underworld:

1) Give this person time, but not energy - Accept him or her for exactly what they are - hard to live with! Never expect miraculous recovery from people who de-energize others.

2) Deal only with facts when you talk with the boss - Don't offer excuses or explanations.  If he wanted them he will ask for them.

3) If the abuse becomes unbearable - Set up a private meeting to let him or her know that this type communication doesn't work for you.  How can we do it better?

4) If you are losing too much energy and it's affecting your life - You can always exercise your "Walk-away Point."  No job is so good that you have to stay and be miserable. 

Best to you all,

Dr. Bob

Don't Waste Energy on the Pots and Pans of Life!

The pots and pans life are those insignificant things that happen to us everyday.  Those things that we spend energy on being frustrated or worrying about that are not important.  One of my High School teachers tried to get me to understand this principle when he overheard me complaining to my friends about how much work we had to do.  He said, "Rausch, get off the stage!  All your complaining is not going to change what you have to do AND no one wants to hear it anyway."  He was exactly right.  We need to spend our energy on the important things in life, not the unimportant. 

When you have the job to do, stop bellyaching about it.  If the flight is late or cancelled get a magazine or book to read.  When you get stopped by a traffic light take the time to breath.  These and dozens of other things waste our energy when we allow ourselves to get upset about them. 

I like what Josh Billings said, "Life can be a grindstone, and whether it grinds a man down or polishes him up depends on the stuff he's made of."   Keep your energy for those things that make the real difference in your life.

Best to you all,

Dr. Bob

Dealing with the Difficult Boss

We all know or have read the affects of stress on the body.  If you remain in a stressful situation or relationship sooner-or-later your body is going to react to it.  In most stressful situations it's not "What's the matter with us?" it's "Who's the matter with us?"  The more we over-process our frustration with a difficult person the more stress we will experience.  Keep in mind, when you are thinking about how much you resent someone, you're the one that's having the sleepless nights.  The person you are frustrated with, in all probability, is sleeping like a baby. 

When I was taking karate training I asked the black belt, "What do you really do if a person confronts you on the street?"  His response was "Control and Intent."  He went on to say, "Always control your emotions.  Be alert, but don't get emotional about it.  Secondly, have an intention!  Know what you're going to do before the confrontation happens."  I think that's a great way to deal with a difficult boss as well.  Don't get into the emotions and decide before hand how you want to respond to him or her so you don't waste energy needlessly. 

Best to you all,

Dr. Bob 

The Boss from the Underworld

Have you ever worked for a boss that you firmly believed came from another world?  Over the last few months I have had several people email me with "boss" problems.  Each one described what we might call the "Boss from Hades."   This type boss seems to be committed to making life miserable for every employee.  They are suspicious, critical, and abusive.  But if anyone complains to human resources the response is, "It's his management style - get use to it."  It's almost impossible to get use to a personality that changes daily or, in some cases, hourly.

Here are some questions to consider about this boss:  What does this type boss do to the energy of the team?  What's an effective response to him or her?  If this type boss drains energy, how does that affect productivity?

One of my friends is the CEO of a steel company and very tuned in to what makes a company work.  His definition of success is, "Enterprise energy and the direction of that energy is the key to the success of the enterprise."  In his opinion energy is one of the keys to success in business.  Think about it - when you increase the energy of individuals you are also increasing the energy of the enterprise.  If the boss is draining the energy of people he's also decreasing performance.  It's really simple - if employees have to worry about the boss' behavior they are wasting energy that could be used for productivity.  The job of the boss is to make sure every person is fully energized, so the company is fully productive. 

Best to you,

Dr. Bob

Cutting the boss some slack...

It is difficult dealing with the boss from Hades on a daily basis, but consider this.  It may be his or her behavior is the result of insecurity or low self-esteem.  If you show me a bully I'll show you a coward.  The more pushy a person is the more afraid he is that someone is going to push back.  This belief was confirmed for me in the book The Witch Doctors by Micklethwait and Wooldrige.  They quote a psychologist who asked Senior American Executives, "What they would least want their subordinates to know about them.  In 19 out of the 20 cases the answer was the same.  They feared that their subordinates would learn how inadequate they felt in their jobs."

Now, how much energy do you think it takes for someone to worry about other people finding out how inadequate they felt?  Probably a lot!  So, maybe the boss is really not attempting to be a "jerk," but in reality trying to prove he's competent.  I know, either way, he's still a jerk, but at least this perspective cuts him some slack.  And, maybe help you not waste energy on someone who only feels inadequate.

Who Influenced You?

Leaders have a hard time comprehending the importance of their influence.  In order for you to understand how critical influence is I would like for you to complete this exercise.  Make a list of the five people who have influenced you the most in your life.  That person may be a parent, a teacher, coach, boss, or a dear grandmother.  After you list the name of the person write next to it "how" that person influenced you.  For example, one of the people who had a profound inpact on my life was my Training Instructor in the Air Force.  I had only been in for about three weeks when I decided I had made a very big mistake.  So, in order to correct my mistake, I asked to see the Tech Sgt. who was our Training Instructor.  I told him I didn't believe I fit in the Air Force and wanted to go home.  The only time he spoke nicely to me was the few minutes it took him to say, "Rausch, this is the easy part of life.  If you don't go through the easy parts you will have big problems with the hard parts."  Those few words and his influence had incredible impact on me.  It changed my attitude about how I defined the level of difficulty of things that happened to me.

Who influenced you?  We all have people who molded our behavior by their influence. Some of those people influenced us with their kindness or wisdom.  Some on your list may be people who negatively influenced your life, which caused you to say, "I'll never be like that."  In both cases influence is energizing.